7 Things to Do When You are Really Sad
I enjoy sitting still, doing less, and simply being (more with less). I've been doing this for years, and it's easy to forget that slowing down takes effort and practice. We'll keep doing that together in the future, but I've recently realized that sometimes doing is necessary, and sometimes busyness is a well-deserved distraction. Especially if you are depressed.
I get down like everyone else, but it's rare for me to be truly depressed. I don't need much to be happy, and expressing gratitude for what does usually makes me happy. This week is a little different from the others.
My daughter is leaving for Australia today. For one year. I'm thrilled for her and eagerly await her big adventure, but I'm already missing her. I'll be visiting, and I'm sure we'll keep in touch, but I enjoy having her close by and the time we spend together. I've been preparing for this for a while now, but I'm still sad. Didn't I say she might be gone for a year?
Then came the wrecking ball...
Guinness, our 8-year-old dog, has a particularly aggressive form of bone cancer. I took him to the vet last Thursday for what I thought was a pulled muscle or tendon and got the bad news. Our family is dealing with this shocking news, attempting to manage his pain and carefully considering treatment options. None of them are easy or have a good outcome, but there is nothing I will not do for this dog.
He entered our lives just a few weeks after I was diagnosed with MS in 2006, and he has since helped to heal our family. It is now our turn to heal him.
I'm very depressed.
I've shifted my focus from feeling to doing because I feel like crying most of the time. I recognize my sadness, but I don't want to be sad, so I keep busy. If you're feeling particularly down, I hope this to-do list will help you get through the day until you feel better.
1. Write: I may not be crying all day, but I am expressing my emotions with ink on paper. I won't share or keep everything I write, but it's good to get it out there. Use writing or another creative process to help you relax and process.
2. Assist: I've been running errands and assisting my daughter in packing and preparing for her trip. I also enjoy assisting her with her blog, which she is starting to share her adventures on. When you're feeling down, consider others. Lifting others' spirits will lift yours as well.
3. Clean: Get lost in sweeping or dishwashing. With the right attitude, even laundry can be relaxing. I have a feeling my house will be spotless by the end of the day.
4. Take action: I understand that I have no control over the outcome of any of this, but implementing a plan and taking action can help to prevent a downward spiral. The sooner you transition from being a victim to an advocate or champion, the better.
5. Get Moving: Working out and going for walks can help you get out of a funk. Many studies show that people who exercise on a regular basis have a better mood and lower stress levels.
6. Take care of yourself: It's natural to want to devote all of your time and energy to trying to fix everything, even if it means neglecting your own needs. I was about to go in this direction when I realized that in order to give my best, I had to be my best. Eat healthily and get plenty of rest.
7. Seek assistance. Inform people of your requirements. Talking to my close friends and family this week has been extremely beneficial. It's just comforting to know they're there. Accept assistance and advice, and then put your trust in yourself to know what is best. If your sadness lasts longer than you think it should, or if you suspect it is leading to depression, seek professional help.
Please don't be sad for me if you want to help me. Instead, send Guinness your love, prayers, good wishes, and positive thoughts. Love has extremely powerful healing properties.
None of these things will make your sadness go away, but they will assist you in getting through it. I've been putting all of these strategies to use over the last few days, and they're working.
One of the benefits of simplifying your life, in my experience, is more happiness, or more time to enjoy more happiness, but it does not prevent sad things from happening. Perhaps being truly sad allows us to fully appreciate the true sweetness of life. Don't berate yourself if you cry or feel down. Allow yourself some time to be sad before returning to the sweetness.
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